Talking to Kids about Gender Identity by Mark Yarhouse

Mark Yarhouse continues to be my favorite author on sexuality and adolescence. Such a strong balance of theological knowledge and professional counseling experience and insights.

In Talking to Kids about Gender Identity, Yarhouse does a great job of explaining the major concepts and labels surrounding gender identity to parents as well as giving solid advice on how to have conversations with their children. What is helpful is the combination of real world stories and hypothetical conversations where he helps parents see effective and ineffective approaches they can take.

Yarhouse writes, “Our exchanges should be a mixture of convictions, civility, and compassion, and we should pray for wisdom, discernment, and prudence in how we carry and embody this mixture in our exchanges with others and in what we model for our children.” (p57) He goes on to say, “Whenever we speak about ‘what God thinks’ about something – anything – we should do so with humility, because we may not get it perfectly right.” (p60) I believe he draws a good roadmap for parents to follow in understanding the topic and in preparing parents for conversations with their kids.

I found myself highlighting my way through the book and see myself referring to these highlights time and again. I definitely recommend this book to any parents looking for help in understanding gender identity and talking with their kids about it. In reality, with how much children and teens are hearing and talking about gender identity, parents in general would do well to be proactive and read this kind of book while their kids are young so they are in a better place to navigate conversations before they happen.

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